Do you know that many people who are ultra-successful walk around with imposter syndrome? They are by all accounts accomplished, but they feel terrible because they don’t think they deserve it. They feel like a total fake. People with imposter syndrome feel as if everything they are doing is a fluke and at any moment someone else is going to find out about the truth. If you feel that way sometimes, use these tips to overcome imposter syndrome.
- If You Think Success Was Too Easy Think Again
If you are feeling as if your success was too easy to come by compared to what you thought it would take before you experienced it, this can be a reason you experience imposter syndrome. Think again. You feel fraudulent because it was simple to achieve, and you now think it’s not even that special because anyone can do it.
The way to deal with this erroneous feeling is to look at some stats. How many people in your situation have achieved what you have achieved? You’re likely to find out that not as many people have succeeded doing what youíre doing as you think. This information alone should help you realize that you had to be responsible at least a little for your achievement. Even if other people could do it if they wanted to, you did it – they did not.
2. If You Think No One Is Self-Made So You Don’t Deserve Kudos
Everyone gets some form of help, whether it’s the zip code they’re born in or meeting the right people at the right time, or something else. Even if itís just being able to drive to and from work, someone had to build the roads, and you had to be born being able to see to do it. Therefore, someone helped and youíre not totally self-made.
So guess what. No one is self-made. But, everyone has some part in their own success. It doesnít matter if you were born on first base, third base, or not even on the field; you are responsible for your actions from where you found yourself to where you are now.
You deserve kudos for it. You deserve the life you are building and itís okay to accept that you value the things you have achieved, and you could not have done it without making the choices you made. Even if someone gave you a million dollars, you had choices. You could blow that million dollars or you could invest it and turn it into a billion dollars. Either way, you are where you are now due to your own choices at the time.
3. You Have Value
The hard thing for people who have imposter syndrome to understand is the value they provide by being who they are. Even if 100,000 people are doing what you want to do, you provide a unique input and value to your version of that thing that no one else can ever provide. This means that even if you are making money selling blue jeans, which are everywhere, your jeans are special because you came up with the idea.
Anytime you can provide something for someone, it is valuable (and that value is in the eye of the beholder); it doesnít matter if itís a commodity or if itís totally 100 percent unique. Your special touch adds just enough value to make it worthwhile to you and to others. When you accept your value to the world, you’ll be able to let go of imposter syndrome and instead of asking, “why me?” you’ll start asking “why not me?”.
Overcoming imposter syndrome is to accept that you are important as you are, that you offer something special even if itís similar to others, and that you are valuable in your own right. You are valuable just because you exist and the things you do add value to the lives around you, even if it is not totally original or new. To overcome imposter syndrome, try to be your authentic self.
Authentic Self
How do some people pretend to be something or someone they aren’t? Often in social situations, people act differently than they do with their close friends and family. However, it’s important to stay true to who you are, to be your authentic self.
It’s natural that people want to be accepted but the key to staying true to yourself is not worrying too much about what others think or believe. People should accept you for who you are. Don’t waste your time on toxic people who don’t accept it:
- You can’t live up to the person you are pretending to be.
If you aren’t being your authentic self, you will falter at some point. It’s not a matter of if, but when. Did you ever notice that people who lie, often tell a different story later? This is because they won’t remember what the story was in the past and have no choice but to make up new details. If you are pretending to be someone you are not, this is essentially the same as lying. - Know who you are.
It’s important to know yourself. This may seem like an obvious statement, but many people don’t know who they are. Dig deep to discover the subtle aspects of your life that you tend to ignore or keep hidden. There is no need to hide your true personality because that is who you are. You can’t change that. - Stop trying to be someone else.
Everyone has people they look up to. However, looking up to someone and trying to be them is not the same. It’s worthwhile to emulate some of their desirable traits, but make sure you aren’t stepping outside of who you are deep down. - Don’t compromise on your values.
If you believe in something, stand firm. Sometimes, you’ll have no choice to make some compromises, but don’t cave in if they go against your beliefs. You must live with these choices. You want to be able to sleep at night. - Negativity should not be a character trait you accept.
You won’t get far with negativity. If you are a negative person, this is not who you truly are. Remember, you don’t come out of the womb being negative. It’s something you learn. It’s time to unlearn it. - Keep a Journal.
Keeping a journal is one of the best ways to figure out “who you are”. People often find that it is easier to be honest when writing down their thoughts. A journal will allow you to reflect on who you are, and then you can act accordingly.