Author: Addy

Inspirational blogger, previous Yahoo Voices writer. Meditation practitioner.

Categories
Time management

procrastinating? use self compassion

where to start when you need help

Are you a procrastinator?

I am.  I put things off no matter how often I beat myself up over waiting to the last minute to pack for a vacation, book a flight, get to work or file taxes.  I struggled with deadlines.  I kept repeating the same pattern over again.

If you’re ready to finally beat procrastination and get ahead of the game, you’re in the right place.

Throughout a series of blog posts, I’m going to share my best tips and strategies for overcoming procrastination and setting up an inspiring morning routine. I will show you how I learned to look up at the sky and find my true North star.

Photo by Suleyman Seykan on Pexels.com

I will share with you my suggestions, and we start today with learning about self-compassion. I know it seems like an odd place to start, but it’s an important first step because self-compassion can overcome procrastination.

Self-compassion is noticing that you are suffering and showing warmth and kindness to yourself.  Instead of ignoring your pain, you comfort yourself right at that moment.  You stop criticizing yourself, and you start understanding yourself better.  It is about forgiveness and being able to let go.

There’s nothing you can do about the past except to learn from it. Beating yourself up about not following a plan you made or reaching an unmet deadline does not improve the situation.  Needless to say, it aggravates it even more since it can cause undue stress. Yes, not all stress is bad. Stress can motivate you if you think about is as a challenge. But for some of us stress leads to excessive negative self-talk and feelings of judgement which reinforce your habit to procrastinate even more.

Next time you find yourself procrastinating, tell yourself that it’s okay. It’s not the end of the world. Say it out loud and then give yourself the opportunity to try again. It is okay to sometimes fail.

Even famous entrepreneurs learn how to fail.

In a recent Masterclass, Sara Blakely, the founder of Spanx, told the story of how her father asked her about her failures when she was a child and how they celebrated each one of them. It made her a stronger person and built character for her to reach her goals.

Trying is the most important part here. You’re working on mastering a new set of skills and changing an existing habit, which takes practice, time, and of course, failure. It’s part of the learning process.

You may feel frustrated at times about your lack of improvement. It’s normal; tap into that frustration and use it to motivate you going forward.

Vow to try again. Look at your mistakes.

What caused you to procrastinate this time? Learn from it, and you will start to realize that you are able to accept who you are regardless of the outcome.

There’s always something new to learn whenever we fail at something or slip back into an unhealthy habit. At the very least, we figure out that something isn’t completely working out for us.

Show a little self-compassion!  Forgive yourself for procrastinating so you can move on and practice some more.

Congratulations, you completed the first step in beating procrastination. Join our email list below to learn more.

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Categories
Morning routine

why I started a blog and a morning routine

My morning routine started the night before. It consisted of late-night social media posts, watching YouTube videos, and setting my alarm to 6:00 am but snoozing until 7:00 am. Hurriedly, I brushed my teeth and dressed for work.

But I needed to make a short stop before at Starbucks.

Why did the barista take so long to make me a flat tall white? Why were there so many people in line? Why didn’t I order from the iPhone app instead?

Does this sound familiar?

My mind was full of questions without any real answers. I stared at my watch as time ticked away. Clearly, I procrastinated by making excuses for myself.

This pattern repeated itself over time and what was supposed to be a joyous morning routine became painstaking when I arrived at the office. It became my new normal. I became accepting of this status quo of arriving rushed, flustered, and late.

And one day, my boss called me into his office. I thought that I was on the verge of losing my job.

It was like a scene of the Devil Wears Prada and I had to make a change right then and there. #befree #beyou

I took a centering breath remembering what I had once learned from Dr. Tara Brach that breathing will help me regain my balance. I inhaled, relaxed my body, and allowed my breath to connect to my inner wisdom and strength.

As I sat across my boss, I recognized the problem– I was a procrastinator. This was the hardest and most uncomfortable part of it all. But the recognition of the problem led me to a sense of acceptance. It wasn’t that I was accepting the status quo of becoming a procrastinator, but that I acknowledged that I was a procrastinator. I recognized the moment just as a moment without my mind adding more to it. It was the beginning of an act of mindfulness. I allowed the moment to happen and I offered my boss a cup of Starbucks coffee.

Then I probed the situation. Instead of asking the question of why I asked how.

How would I feel if I were the boss?

It was this act of investigating his feelings that led me away from my self-centered thinking. What was I believing? I started searching for truth without judgment.

But inside, I listened to those self-limiting beliefs that overpowered me. Yes, those beliefs that tell you that you are not good enough and that you are not worthy. I breathed and let them pass and concentrated on the moment.

I began by nurturing and showing self-compassion. I treated myself with child-like kindness. I imagined being bathed by a warm feeling that everything will be alright.

And it was. . .

In short, I started a morning routine because I wanted to be mindful of myself, others, and the time I spend with them. With this blog, I hope to inspire you to be kind to yourself. It’s never too late to start.

In my next post, I will show you how I developed a morning routine.

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Categories
Time management

be free: time management strategies

Girl with hands up in the air. Below a cloud with the title: be free time management strategies, A palomino horse running in a field.

Time management is all about staying focused on the end goal. Many writers like Tim Ferris from The 4-Hour Workweek: Escape 9–5, Live Anywhere, and Join the New Rich use the Pareto Principle, also known as the ’80:20 Rule’. At first, it sounds like a complex subject, but it’s one that works and is highly recommended for success.

the 80:20 rule

Simply, 80% of efforts that are not time managed or unfocused generates only 20% of the desired output. However, 80% of the desired output can be generated using only 20% of a well time managed effort. Although the ratio ’80:20′ is only arbitrary, it is used to put emphasis on how much is lost or how much can be gained with time management.

Some people view time management as a list of rules that involves scheduling appointments, goal settings, thorough planning, creating things-to-do lists, and prioritizing. These are the core basics of time management that should be understood to develop efficient personal time management skills. These basic skills can be fine-tuned further to include the finer points of each skill that can give you that extra reserve to make the results you desire.

There are more skills involved in time management than the core basics. Skills such as decision making, inherent abilities such as emotional intelligence and critical thinking are also essential to your personal growth.

Personal time management involves everything you do. No matter how big and no matter how small, everything counts. Each new knowledge you acquire, each new advice you consider, each new skill you develop should be taken into consideration.

personal time management

Having a balanced life-style should be the key result in having personal time management. This is the main aspect that many practitioners of personal time management fail to grasp.

Time management is about getting results, not about being busy.

The six areas that personal time management seeks to improve in anyone’s life are physical, intellectual, social, career, emotional, and spiritual.

  1. The physical aspect involves having a healthy body, less stress, and fatigue.
  2. The intellectual aspect involves learning and other mental growth activities.
  3. The social aspect involves developing personal or intimate relations and being an active contributor to society.
  4. The career aspect involves school and work.
  5. The emotional aspect involves handling your feelings under undue stress.
  6. The spiritual aspect involves a personal quest for meaning.

Thoroughly planning and having a set of things-to-do for each of the key areas may not be very practical, but determining which area in your life must receive more attention is part of time management.

Each area creates a better version of you. If you are ignoring one area, then you are ignoring an important part of yourself.

Personal time management should not be a daunting task. It is a very sensible and reasonable approach to solving problems big or small.

A great way of learning time management and improving your personal life is to follow several basic activities:

  • Review your goals, whether it be immediate or long-term goals, often by keeping a list in a place that is accessible like an iPad, notepad, or computer.
  • Determine which task is necessary or not necessary in achieving your goals and which activities are helping you maintain a balanced lifestyle. Monitoring your peak time and slow times, you should be able to tell when to do the difficult tasks when we are the sharpest.
  • Learn to say “No”. You actually see this advice often. Heed it even if it involves saying the word to family or friends.
  • Pat yourself at the back or just reward yourself in any manner for an effective time management result.
  • Obtain cooperation from people around you who actually benefit from your efforts in time management.
  • Attend to necessary things immediately. Don’t procrastinate.
  • Maintain a positive attitude and set yourself up for success. Be realistic in your approach to achieving your goals.
  • Record or journal of all your activities. This will help you get things in their proper perspective.

These are the few steps you initially take in becoming a well-rounded individual.

Personal time management is the art and science of building a better life.

From the moment you integrate management skills, you have opened several options that can provide a broad spectrum of solutions to your personal growth. It also creates more doors for opportunities to knock on.

Photo by Artem Beliaikin on Pexels.co

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