Categories
mindfulness yoga

an easy guide to practice yoga with mindfulness

Do you not only want to exercise because it’s good for your health, but for your energy and happiness? To feel that joy and satisfaction from moving your body, you need mindfulness to help you truly appreciate how it makes your body feel.

It might be quite trendy to attend a yoga studio with your friends, but the discipline has been practiced for 5,000 years. Yoga was originally a spiritual practice focused on creating harmony between the mind and the body. Nowadays, we are well aware of its benefits.

You will get better sleep – With yoga you are more likely to regulate your breathing inducing relaxation. You also focus on exercises your body needs, which can help you sleep much better over time.

It helps to reduce your anxiety – You may also notice that you start to enjoy yoga more, and do forms of movement that reduce your anxiety.

You get better strength and flexibility – Exercise is going to help a lot with your strength and flexibility, but yoga has an interesting effect when you follow your body’s cues. You enjoy how it feels, as opposed to how it looks.

How to Practice Yoga with Mindfulness

To practice yoga with mindfulness, you need to be aware of your breath, body, and surroundings. By being mindful you tune into the pace of your breath, which in turn calms the body and the mind. You also become more aware of your physical space.

1. Choose your yoga practice.

It can be easy to just get used to a certain routine, and not think much about it. But with mindfulness, you are much more in tune with your body and your mindset, so you become aware of your limitations and strengths. First, ask your doctor if yoga is right for you. If you are a beginner or know that you’re inflexible, look for the gentler forms of yoga. Attempt to avoid more demanding forms like bikram (hot), ashtanga and power yoga. Second, to practice yoga with mindfulness you should speak to your instructor about any physical limitations to accommodate your needs. 

2. Try a gentle warm up 

You should also be mindful of your warm-up routine. Try to set aside ten minutes of gentle movements. By warming up to practice yoga with mindfulness, you will stretch your muscles and improve your circulation as you build up your poses. 

3. Know your limitations.

Listen to your body. One of the best ways to know your limitations is by running a full body scan. Your body tells you how it feels throughout the day, but if you aren’t paying attention, you will never notice. This is where the full body scan comes in. You become aware of any pains or aches. You learn about your strengths and vulnerabilities.

Start your body scan at the top of your head. Pay attention to each part of your head, face, neck, and shoulders, then work your way down. You want to try to feel each body part as you mentally move down your arms, wrists and hands, your chest, back and torso, your legs, and all the way down to your feet. 

Once you are aware focus on your own progress when you practice yoga. If a yoga pose doesn’t feel right or hurts then stop. You should master basic poses first and move on to more difficult ones when your body and mind are ready. 

4. Keep an exercise journal

You can start a journal that becomes a list of exercises to do, and others to avoid. Every time you try a new exercise, or discover something new about a workout, write it down in your journal. Write down as many details as you can, including the type of exercise, the environment (like in a gym or outside), who you did the exercise with, the duration, and how you felt afterward. If you didn’t like it, write that down. Don’t try to change your feelings about the exercise. Just notice how you feel in the moment.

Black woman in tights and grey shirt touching toes.

Categories
habits hygge mindfulness

mindful fall hygge for a new season

Have you ever tried mindful hygge? Hygge, pronounced (Hue-gah) is a Danish word originally derived from an Old Norwegian word meaning well-being and protection from the outside elements. Denmark has notoriously bitter long winters. So, it’s no wonder that the concept of hygge has been used by Danish people to help mentally combat the change in season and fill their homes with comfort and love.

Hygge is a word that is so important to Danish people; it’s often used to describe what their culture is all about. Hygge is not necessarily something specific that you can buy, because it’s more of a feeling than a possession.. Hygge can widely be described as a feeling of coziness, comfort, familiarity, friendship, laughter and mindful enjoyment. It is about the little joys in life that makeup your mindful experience.

Although it it totally possible to achieve hygge any time of the year. You can try maybe lighting up a fire pit in the backyard with or a movie under the stars with family are perfectly good examples of summertime hygge. Hygge is generally associated with the change in season to cooler months because of its ability to uplift spirits especially when you are downtrodden.

Here are some ways to practice mindful hygge:

1. Warm lighting. In order to achieve a great sense of hygge, be sure to change your light bulbs from bright light to warm. According to MeikeWiking, a hygge expert, the optimal light temperature is 1800K, which is the temperature of sunsets. Warm lightning is essential for an atmospheric glow.

2. Cozy clothing. Put the sweatpants away and try wearing those cozy knit sweaters and woolen socks. Think about the texture of the clothing and how it feels on your body. If it’s loose, cozy, and warm then your are practicing mindful hygge.

3. Spiced drinks. Pumpkin spice frapuccinos might just be a Starbucks thing, but it definitely makes me think of cozy fall days. Apple cider and tea are favorites too. Drinks with cloves, cinnamon, cardamom, cloves, and ginger can warm up your senses. These drinks smell delicious too.

4. Scented candles. Placing scented candles around your home is a wonderful way to add a hint of mindful hygge. The warm glow will make rooms feel cozy and comfortable. Not only do candles look and feel homey, they also smell great. If you have a local candle maker near you, even better. Scents like warm vanilla, cinnamon apple, sugar plum are cozy and invigorating.

5. Heart-felt relationships. Call a friend for a hot cup of coffee and a piece of apple cake. Sweet apple cake with almonds and powdered sugar is a Scandinavian treat. With some heart-felt conversation and empathy your relationship will grow.

6. Pull out the cozy throws. Feel the warmth of a cozy throw; the plushier and softer then the better. Cozy throws are an essential, especially during a chilly morning.

7. Star gaze. Disconnect from your phone and from social media and take a look at the night sky. Fall is the time to look up into the sky and admire the stars. On October 20, look up into the sky to admire the full moon called the Hunter’s Moon. October is the month of two meteor showers, the Draconids and the Orionids.

8. Fall journal writing. Try mindfully journaling about the change in season. Pay attention to the changes in weather, smells, routines and how you feel in the present moment. Be thankful about the connections you have made.

Check out the free digital downloadable mindfulness fall journal below with 12 prompts about the season:


Categories
Self-care

being nonjudgmental with mindfulness when self-blame takes over

Self-blame refers to a person’s tendency to consider themselves at fault, especially when things don’t go as well as planned, even if the cause or events were beyond their control. A pattern of self-blame leads a person to feel constantly guilty and inferior. 

Although the tendency to self-blame can make a person seem humble and unassuming, it can also inhibit them in becoming more creative and wanting to strive to do better. 

People who have a persistent habit of blaming themselves for anything that goes wrong will usually avoid taking the initiative. This is because they prefer to stay inconspicuous so they won’t receive any extra needless attention. In doing so, they hope that others will have similar expectations of their capabilities. 

Being self-critical is the act of telling ourselves negative and destructive thoughts, such as being inadequate, shameful, or a failure. We almost all have a tendency to be self-critical to some degree. 

However, the problem begins when this becomes a habit; a negative, self-reinforcing loop. This is because constant self-criticism causes a person to become stuck with negative thoughts and emotions about themselves. They feel guilt and shame to the extent that they no longer feel any desire to achieve. If left unaddressed, this inaction can lead to depression or other mental health issues. 

Self-criticism deprives an individual of being able to look at their own efforts or abilities objectively. It robs them of being able to engage in healthy self-reflection, which would allow them to be more accepting of any past mistakes.

We can get away with a little bit of self-blame and self-criticism occasionally. However, if we continually beat ourselves up and start to do it more often than not, then we may not be able to stop and do an objective reality check. 

Remember, your mind is incredibly powerful. If you continually feed it with self-blaming and self-criticizing words, those words will get louder and more believed and ingrained. In turn this can increase your risk of developing anxiety or depression. 

Self-criticism and self blame can be beneficial to some degree

Photo by Ron Lach on Pexels.com

They do help us ‘get real’ about ourselves. Sometimes we may be a little guilty of believing our own press. Some critical self-evaluation allows us to identify and accept our imperfections and take conscious steps to improve them. However, if self-blame and self-criticism become the norm, it can paralyze us into inaction. 

Consequently, you will be hindered from achieving your full potential. Therefore, it’s important to keep self-blame and self-criticism within healthy levels. Simply, it should be a feedback mechanism, not a tool for consistent self-deprecation.

But what if being self-critical get out of hand? Could it be possible you hate yourself too much? Self-hatred is more than simply not liking yourself. When you suffer with self-hatred, you’ll constantly put yourself down and feel like you aren’t good at anything.

Here, we’ll look at what self-hatred is, the impact it can have on your life and how you can stop it in its tracks.

Understanding self-hatred

Self-hatred is basically like having a little bully sat inside your head. You will experience constant criticizing thoughts, pointing out your flaws and mistakes. Just some common self-hatred thoughts you might experience include:

  • You’re a loser
  • Why did you event try, you knew you would fail
  • You aren’t good enough
  • Why can’t you just be normal?

You’ll put yourself down and compare yourself to others frequently. Self-hatred tends to develop over time and is triggered by more than one event. 

How can it impact your life?

Although self-doubt is healthy, self-hatred is not. If you struggle with self-hatred, it can have a devastating impact on your life. Often the feelings of self-hatred worsen over time and can lead to destructive behaviors as you try and numb the negative self-talk. 

Many people who suffer with self-hatred go on to develop destructive behaviors such as cutting themselves, develop eating disorders or turn to drugs and alcohol. It can impact every aspect of your life including your relationships, your career, and the friends you include in your life. You may also stop caring about the things you used to enjoy and avoid things that make you feel better.

The impact it can have on your life makes it important to treat quickly, rather than ignore it. The question is, how can you eliminate self-hatred?

Ways to eliminate self-hatred from your life

There are many ways to eliminate self-hatred from your life. Learning how to tame your inner bully is a great first step. So, when you notice that inner voice telling you negative things about yourself, switch it around. Stop those negative thoughts in their tracks and turn them into a positive.

So, if your inner bully says, “you aren’t worth anything,” switch it to “I may feel like I am not worthy, but I know that I am.” The more you counteract the negative with positive thoughts, the more positive your mind will become.

You can also make a list of all your strengths. If you struggle to come up with some, ask those closest to you. When you focus on your strengths, you won’t be too caught up in your weaknesses.

Finally, work on building up self-compassion. That is, treat yourself the exact same way you would treat a good friend. Would you beat them up for making a mistake? If not, why do it to yourself?

Overall, self-hatred can be a powerful thing to overcome since it builds up over time. However, the tips above can help you to start quieten your inner bully and develop a little more self-compassion. 

Try a mindfulness to be more nonjudgmental.

Mindfulness Steps To Keep Your Self-Blaming and Self-Criticism In Check

  1. Focus your criticism on your behavior.

Behaviors can be changed. This is why when your inner voice starts to be critical, it is time to address your behaviors. Be careful not to criticize your attributes, as you can’t always change them, or need to. Your attributes are a part of your uniqueness. 

If you blame yourself for not being super-intelligent, you run the risk of drowning in frustration and depression. If instead you more correctly blame or criticize your habit of spending too much time on your smartphone instead of studying, then chances are you can find ways to rectify the behavior, and therefore change the result. 

2. Know the difference between taking responsibility and self-blaming.

Instead of being quick to blame or criticize yourself, try to assess the situation first. It is important that you look into every aspect of yourself, and see how your actions, inactions, and the words you have left unspoken, affected the entire outcome of the situation. Accept your mistakes and come up with ways on how you can improve yourself as well as the situation in the future. 

2. Acknowledge your self-critical inner voice.

When your inner voice tells you that you are lazy, not worthy or inadequate, acknowledge these thoughts. Start by creating a journal of the things that you like about yourself, and your strengths. Creating this type of journal will help you appreciate yourself more and criticize yourself less. 

If you work on improving yourself, your skills, abilities, and behavior you will find it easier to get rid of your negative self-critical inner voice.

Categories
mindfulness

how mindlessness can lead to mindfulness

Mindlessness is the opposite of mindfulness.  It operates on auto-pilot and happens when you don’t think about anything.  You simply go through the motions.  The same routine repeats itself and mindlessly.  It can happen when you drive to work and think about other things, which don’t involve the here and now.  “Did I forget to sign that document?  What’s for dinner?” Your thought process becomes random and unfocused on the moment.  You can become unaware of your surroundings and the car collision down the road.  Another mindless act is eating without thinking.  When you munch on a cookie  while watching your favorite k-drama, you can become mindless.  You become so wrapped up in the drama with your favorite star that you don’t pay attention to what you eat and then blame yourself for gaining weight.  Essentially, mindlessness leads to really bad habits.

These bad habits are learned and can lead to further mindlessness. And how did you learn these bad habits?   You learn to be mindless as a child.  You might have heard from your parents to “suck it up”. This message can become internalized in your brain as “don’t feel anything”.  As a child, you learn from this behavior that you can shut down your feeling leading to mindlessness.

How do you turn around mindlessness? You don’t ignore your past or become preoccupied with the future. You use mindfulness by becoming self-aware of the moment. Think about the analogy of an apple. You buy an apple at a farmer’s market and you think about how the apple tree grew in a grove. You think about how it was cared for by kind farmers that watered and fertilized the trees. The seeds of the apple represent the future. But the moment, is now. This is the moment when you take a bite into the apple.

Photo by Skylar Kang on Pexels.com

Mindfulness is being aware of the present moment.  When you are mindful, you are aware of yourself and your surroundings.  In fact, you are acting intentionally with a purposeful action.  With mindfulness we start by understanding ourselves, our environment and how we respond to others.  Mindfulness can also balance and renew your energy to follow your goals.  

While meditation may be the most effective way to achieve mindfulness, there are other options you can try. Maybe you find it difficult to practice the traditional seated contemplation. Maybe you question its value. In meditation we may have upward of three hundred thoughts so it is easy to get frustrated or caught up with perfection.  It’s impossible to fail at meditation. Even if you sit for a short time then you are able to carry out a mindfulness exercise. here is no right or wrong way to carry out mindfulness. There’s no special technique for mindfulness.  Certainly,  you can still find more happiness and peace of mind through a variety of physical and mental practices.

There are many ways that you can be mindful throughout your day without ever having to take a break from whatever it is that you’re doing. Knowing this has helped many extremely busy people to be able to get into the habit of practicing mindful activities.

One simple way to practice mindfulness is by brushing your teeth. You do this so often that you probably do it without even thinking about it. Instead of brushing your teeth on autopilot, take the time to focus on the steps involved in this routine. 

Feel the bristles of the brush as they cross your teeth and tongue. Pay attention to the thickness of the toothpaste of the flavor of it. While you’re brushing your teeth, pay attention to the process and don’t let your mind think about worries or negative thoughts. 

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

Another way that you can practice mindfulness as you go about your day is through mindful listening. So many times, there are sounds around you and yet you don’t even hear them because you’re not listening with a focus. 

Wherever you are, you can take a few seconds to listen to the sounds. You might be able to hear a bird singing, the wind blowing or the distant roll of thunder. You can practice mindful listening with popular music or with instrumentals. 

Hear each sound and focus on it for a few seconds while tuning out anything but the sound. Mindfulness can be practiced by focusing on breathing. It doesn’t take long and can be done any time of day and in any place. 

As you breathe, focus on the breath that you’re drawing in. Then focus on the breath that you’re exhaling. Keep your mind centered on the movement of your body as you breathe in the air and release it. 

Feel the air move within you and tune in to the sensation as you’re going through the exercise. You can practice mindfulness through many other activities including walking, eating, while cooking or cleaning.

Use the following tips for inner mindfulness practices:

  1. Slow down. Moving deliberately promotes mindfulness. Consider the purpose behind your daily activities. Take time to enjoy life instead of rushing from one activity to another.
  2. Focus. Give your full attention to one task at a time. Turn off your phone when you’re having dinner with your family. Listen closely to ordinary conversations and falling rain.
  3. Let go of judgements. Accept your thoughts, feelings, and experiences without guilt or shame. Love yourself for who you are now. Take pleasure in learning and growing. Forgive yourself and others for disappointments and mistakes.
  4. Live in the present. Concentrate on today rather than regretting the past or worrying about the future. Take pleasure in ordinary things like the smell of coffee or the texture of soft cotton sheets.

Free Download:

Download this worksheet on focusing on the present moment with key affirmations and self-reflection questions.

Categories
mindfulness relationships

choosing friends with mindfulness

Friends can enrich our lives. They can help us be better people. But having the wrong kind of friends can be detrimental to your emotional well-being. If you choose friends who treat others unkindly, that can create a negative space in your life. 

The old saying that birds of a feather flock together means that you will become like the company that you keep.

Photo by Elle Hughes on Pexels.com

What you want to have is the kind of friends who will be there for you.

They’ll be happy for you when you have something to celebrate. They’ll hurt with you when something hurts you. They’ll be there for you through the ups as well as the downs of life. 

You want friends who enrich or add to your life rather than ones who make it worse and cause a drain on your emotions. By using mindfulness, you can choose the kind of friends that are healthy to have in your life. 

These will be people who will be open and honest with communication and there will be freedom between the two of you to speak truthfully. You’ll find that when you choose friends mindfully, you’ll have people in your life that you can engage with and even when you disagree, it will be a positive experience. 

Mindfulness can help you attract the right people into your life that can become lifelong friends. It all begins with your focus. Mindfulness teaches you to keep your focus on the positive aspects of other people rather than on their faults. 

When you focus on the positive thoughts you can have toward others, you get back positive responses from other people. By keeping your mind on what’s good about other people, it affects how you feel about them, you perceive them in a different way and it shows in your attitude toward them. 

Mindfulness teaches you to reject the negative thoughts about others and to keep your mind focused on what you like about the person. Even in the best of friendships, there can be disagreements and hurt feelings. 

Mindfulness can help you choose friends wisely and then nurture the relationships once they’re in your life. You’re never going to find a perfect circle of friends. Each person in your friendship circle is going to have traits that will bother you. 

They may not react to things in the way that you would. Mindfulness teaches you to release the judgmental thoughts toward others and instead see them just as you are – flawed or imperfect, yet worthy of love and friendship. 

Mindfulness can give you the wisdom to help you choose friends that can create a give and take relationship – rather than a one sided friendship where someone does all of the giving while the other person does all of the taking. 

When you practice mindfulness, it makes you become the kind of person who attracts good friends, the kind that everyone wants to have. 

Here are three top three tips to help you feel satisfied with your life as you make good friends:

Categories
habits mindfulness

essential self-discipline guide with mindfulness

Self-discipline is an important skill every person who wants to achieve more in life should possess. Self-discipline is essential in every aspect of life. Even though most people recognize the benefits of self-discipline, very few do something to reinforce and grow this beneficial skill. 

Contrary to some beliefs, self-discipline is not being harsh to yourself or living a restrictive lifestyle. Self-discipline also means self-control. It is a sign of inner strength and control of you actions, and your reactions. Self-discipline provides the power to stick to hard decisions, and follow them without changing your mind. This means self-discipline is an important requirement for achieving vital goals. 

Why self-discipline is important

Having self-discipline helps you to continue with your plans and decisions until you achieve them. It also displays as an inner strength that helps you to overcome addictions, laziness, and procrastination. 

Self-discipline is an important ingredient for success. It is the ability not to give up regardless of setbacks and failures. In fact, it is an important pillar of stable, long-term success. It is a skill that will help you understand the importance of life. 

Life presents problems and challenges on the path to success. In order to act above those challenges, you must act with determination and perseverance. Lack of self-discipline may lead to problems such as failure, relationship problems, and health issues. Just as some people have weak muscles, they can become strong with training. It’s the same with self-discipline. You can develop and strengthen self-discipline like any other skill, through training. You can develop self-discipline at any time. 

Photo by Dziana Hasanbekava on Pexels.com

Development of self-discipline will help you:

  • Avoid carelessness.
  • Fulfill promises you make .
  • Overcome bad behaviors such as laziness and procrastination.
  • Engage in good behaviors like going to the gym, swimming or taking a walk even when your mind tells you to stay at home. 
  • Stay focused on your diet and resisting temptation of eating unhealthy food (no sodas).
  • Waking early in the morning.
  • Overcome the bad habit of watching too much television.
  • Start reading motivational books, and implementing what you’ve learned.
  • Meditating regularly.

If you keep working and developing the skill, you will become stronger. On the other hand, if you do not challenge yourself in life, you will not gain self-discipline.

Happiness and the achievement of goals in life results from having a wide range of positive qualities. And no quality is more important in the attainment of long-term sustainable success than self-discipline.

Whether you seek to enhance your relationships, work ethic, or health, nothing beats self-discipline as the principal trait needed to achieve your goal.

However, self-discipline doesn’t always come naturally. The good news is that it can be a learned behavior. Try out these techniques to attain greater self-discipline.

Tips to improve your self-discipline

  1. Remove distractions. Removing distractions from your environment is a critical first step on your journey to increased self-discipline. For instance, if you are looking to cut down on distractions (such as social media) and focus on your job, you need to turn off your mobile notifications and block all social media until you get off work. In the example of weight loss, you would want to remove the unhealthy foods from your cabinets and pantry to make achieving your goal that much easier.
  2. Never think there will be a perfect time. Kick the habit of waiting for all things to align perfectly before embarking on your journey to self-discipline. If you are looking to enhance self-control, it has to start with you. Embrace simple things such changing your daily routine, breaking bad habits such as negative thinking, and instead actively developing new habits even if it does not feel right in your mind. But simply start now, instead of thinking there will be a better time.
  3. Reward yourself for achievement. Being self-disciplined does not mean you have to become miserable. In fact, by being too rigid, you are opening yourself up to disappointment, failure, and the possibility of falling back into the old habits. Instead, have days when you relax your regimen. When you reward yourself, you relieve the tension that may result from self-disciplined living.
  4. Don’t beat yourself up for backsliding. At some point, you will fall into some old habits. However, the important thing is not to beat yourself up, but rather to pick yourself up and recommit to the journey. You have to accept that there will be spectacular failures and fabulous successes. Don’t get too hung up in frustration, guilt, and anger, but rather acknowledge mistakes as an essential part of the learning process. Ultimately, developing self-discipline will allow you to live more freely by making choices that are more positive and healthy.
  5. Set active goals. Active goal setting is a very important skill, if you want to become disciplined. In fact, it’s quite different than passive goal setting; with passive goal setting, you just set goals in your mind without properly define them. But active goals have a profound meaning; you make plans and maybe you have already found some strategies, in order to be able to achieve them as soon as possible. So, you need to set some long-term goals and you also have to actively track your progress towards your specific goals in life.
  6. Ignore negativity. There are may be people around you that can exert an immensely negative effect on you. But you don’t have to let them. More specifically, you don’t have to let words or even their expressions deter you. If you can not accomplish it, you can always seek advice from experts, in order to learn how to avoid negativity. For example, if people say what you want to accomplish is not possible or even sneer at your efforts, you should try to avoid them. Instead, you need to use your energy and strength and try to interact with positive people.
  7. Practice Gratitude. You may spend too much time wanting a lot of things in your life. The habit of gratitude can help you move away from constantly wanting what you really don’t have. It’s time for you to start appreciating what you do have in your life and be happy about it. When you do this, you will begin to see some remarkable shifts in your life. Actually, the effects of gratitude are far-reaching. From improving your emotional well-being, to your mental health and spirituality, gratitude can offer you a lot. The most important thing is that gratitude can help you move from a stake of lack towards a state of abundance. For instance, when you live in a state of lack, it’s impossible to focus on achieving your goals and being disciplined. So, you need to focus on positive things and try to succeed your goals, without having stress. 

Categories
Gratitude Positivity Self-care

10 things nobody told you about practicing gratitude

What you focus on comes to pass. When you practice gratitude you are training your mind to be more positive and this has some interesting physical implications. Practicing gratitude and positive thinking directly affects your brain chemistry. By focusing on gratitude and happiness, you control the release of certain chemicals and neurotransmitters that influence how you feel both physically and mentally. Let’s take a look at how that works. 

Dopamine and serotonin

Focusing on happiness and gratitude leads to the release of two “feel good” neurotransmitters – dopamine and serotonin. These two neurotransmitters are responsible for warm feelings. Yes, there are other ways to get them like exercise and chocolate for example. Focusing on positivity, making a conscious effort to be more grateful and happier changes the balances of neurotransmitters in your body and your brain. 

Fewer Stress Hormones 

When you are anxious or scared, the body releases stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. It helps you react fast when you’re about to be hit by a car and make you run faster when you need to get away from someone. But it works against you when it’s a response to something that isn’t a physical danger. Like worrying about contracting COVID-19 or what your co-worker thinks of you. 

Stress hormones can lead to weight gain, depression, anxiety, and they take a toll on your heart. One of the most powerful strategies to reduce stress is practicing gratitude and positive thinking. So choose happiness and know that you are doing wonders for your mental and physical health. 

So what’s the bottom line? When you are mindful of all of the things you are grateful for in your life then you can learn to appreciate all the good even in the midst of the bad and cultivate happiness. Stop waiting for the right person, the right circumstances. Don’t wait for happiness to find you. Be happy right now. In this moment. And use gratitude to help you get there. 

Adversity – Staying Positive When Life Falls Apart

We take a lot of good things for granted in our everyday life. A roof over our heads, a steady paycheck, a loving partner, the ability to go out for a run on the weekends. The specifics vary, but one of the big advantages of modern lives is the many awesome things we can count on. We’re not used to falling short, so when something happens and our life starts to fall apart, it’s easy to fall into thinking patterns that focus on lack and despair. 

Sometimes the bad things are a result of choices we made. Sometimes they are outside of our control. In either case, it is up to us to decide how we react to each crisis. One piece of advice that is important to remember no matter what adversity you face is to make sure you don’t forget about how blessed you really are. Gratitude can turn what we have into enough. 

There’s a quote I love and would like to share with you by Melody Beattie. Here it is: 

“Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity…it makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” 

Think about how you can start to do this in your everyday life. A good place to start is to simply take a deep breath and pause for a moment when things go wrong and everything is starting to feel overwhelming. Then come up with one little thing you are grateful for during this time. It can be something as simple as being able to breathe fresh, clean air, or living to fight another day. 

Find that something and start to build on it. What else are you grateful for? Keep making that mental list until the desperation starts to lift and you can start to think clearly. When you do, you can start to find your way out, no matter how bad things seem at first. And remember, you never know what good might come from the struggle you are facing right now. 

But What If You’re Stuck In Negativity?

Practicing gratitude and focusing on positivity is easier said than done. Especially if you are struggling with anxiety and depression. If you ever find yourself spiraling into the deep pit of depression then get help if you need it.  There’s nothing wrong with talking to a counselor or getting therapy. It’s the smart thing to do. 

When things aren’t quite that bad, there’s a lot you can do to get yourself unstuck from all that negativity. Start by acknowledging them and putting them into words. How exactly do you feel? Is it anger or annoyance? Frustration or disappointment? Try to be specific. Dig deep. Yes, it can be painful and some people prefer to avoid thinking about these feelings, but the first step to getting yourself unstuck is determining exactly where you are emotionally. 

Once you find the true reason for your negative feelings, you can start to work to resolve them. What that looks like will vary from case to case. The important takeaway here is that it gives you something specific and meaningful to do. You no longer feel out of control or helpless. It’s something you can work with and that alone will help you think more positively. 

In addition, it allows you to distance yourself a little from the negative feelings. You may still be upset with your spouse, but it also gives you the space to remember everything you love about him or her. It gives you the space to act outside of the negativity and have a good relationship while you work things out. And sometimes, it may give you the mental space you need to realize that it is up to you to decide if you want to continue to dwell in the negativity, or choose a route of forgiveness. You can’t change everything or everyone. Sometimes your path toward positivity is to acknowledge your negative feelings and then let them go. 

Of course all of this is easier said than done. A journal can be a great tool to help you along the way. Try talking to a close friend or confidant when you feel stuck and you can’t see a path towards positivity. An outside perspective can give a lot of clarity. Meditation can be helpful as well. 

Last but not least, surround yourself with positivity.  Get outside and enjoy nature. Spend some time helping others. And don’t forget to remind yourself regularly of everything you have to be grateful for. 

Turning Gratitude Outward – Sharing With The World

Practicing gratitude regularly has a bit impact on your life, your health, and your mental and emotional wellbeing. But it doesn’t end there. It will also have a big impact on those around you and the world at large when you start to turn your gratitude outwards and share it far and wide. 

Now let’s take this a step further. What if, instead of simply practicing gratitude for yourself, you take it out to the world at large? What could happen? What force of good could you create? There is no telling how many lives you could influence for the better. Let’s take a look at how you, I, and everyone else reading this can start to turn their gratitude outward and share it with those around them. 

Random Acts of Kindness 

Do something kind for a stranger. This can be something as simple as giving an open and honest smile to a stranger on the street or a few kind words and a compliment for the cashier ringing up your groceries. Or it could be taking a meal to an elderly neighbor or buying a drink for the person behind you in the coffee shop drive-thru line. Make it a goal to do something kind for someone each day and do it intentionally. 

Respect And Thank Those Who Serve You 

There are so many people in our communities that serve us from first responders to the waitress at your favorite restaurant. Make it a point to be respectful and thank them with words, with actions, and in the case of that waitress with a generous tip. Show them how grateful you are for everything they do to make your life easier.  

Volunteer In Your Community 

What better way to show your gratitude than to give your time and your skills. There are many opportunities for anyone to volunteer in various projects and for a variety of different causes. See what’s available around you and make an effort to put in some time to volunteer each month. Not only is it a wonderful way to give back and spread gratitude, but you’ll be amazed at how much you get out of it. 

Develop Deeper Relationships 

Last but not least, I would like to encourage you to work on developing deeper relationships. You will have a stronger sense of gratitude and lead by example when you make the time to listen and actively work on coming closer to the people you love. 

Now that you have some ideas, the ball is in your court. What will you do today, this week, or this month to spread gratitude in your own circle of influence? Go out there and make an impact. Make the world a better and more grateful place. 

Living Abundantly By Showing And Sharing Gratitude 

Would you like to live abundantly full of happiness and contentment? How about a life with excellent physical and mental health? Greatly increase your chances of that happening by showing and sharing gratitude. That’s right, something as simple as practicing thankfulness and expressing how grateful you are for the people and things you have in your life has a powerful impact. Here are some simple things you can do starting today to show your gratitude. 

  1. Tell the people you love how grateful you are for them. We often take the ones closest to us for granted. Make a point to do it regularly and be specific to make it meaningful. 
  2. Think about the people who challenge you. Express your gratitude for how they help you grow and make you stronger. 
  3. Take a few minutes each week to write a letter or email to a person who has made a difference to you at one point or another. This could be a teacher, a mentor, an old friend … anyone you can think of. 
  4. Give the gift of your time to someone to show without words how grateful you are to have them in your life. This is particularly important for the elderly people in your life. Your time with them is limited. Make the most of it. 
  5. Start using a gratitude journal and make the time to write down three things you are grateful for every single day. It will brighten even your worst days and put things into perspective. 
  6. Forgive yourself when you don’t reach all your goals, or things don’t go your way. Be grateful for what you have and what you are learning from each experience. 
  7. Compliment the people around you. Make them feel good about themselves. It’s a powerful way to show gratitude in an indirect way. Small, meaningful gifts and acts of service do the same. 
  8. Pay it forward. Do something nice for someone you work with or a total stranger. Random acts of kindness are a wonderful way to spread gratitude and bring more positivity into the world. 
  9. Give a hug and a kind word to someone who’s struggling. Show them through physical affection that you’re there for them and grateful to have them in your life. 
  10. Show your body and mind gratitude for what they do for you day in and day out by taking care of yourself and investing in regular self-care. 
Categories
mindfulness Positivity

3 little tricks on how to overcome negativity

When you experience strong negative emotions, it may seem difficult to build any resilience to difficult life experiences. How can some people give up while others just pick themselves up, keep calm and carry on as if nothing happened? The secret on how to overcome negativity is to use coping skills that are flexible and that you can adapt to your situation. You can learn to use mindfulness, and develop 9 positive attitudes to overcome negativity in this guide

Use Mindfulness Coping Skills

Be Flexible

By seeing negative events in your life as flexible, short term situations, you can more easily move on. Let’s imagine someone who sees these negative events with a fixed mindset. To them, that disappointment they felt with themselves or that failure they felt, is static. It’s always there. Nothing they can do will change their story of the event fact and the disappointment in their lives. 

Someone who may feel entrenched in their negative feelings finds it harder to remove themselves from those feelings and change direction. It’s like getting stuck in a ditch. Those people who are willing to see emotions as passing understand how to let go and change direction quickly. They find solutions to jump over the ditch by building a positive mindset. Those people who build a positive mindset learn how to overcome negativity faster. 

So what can you do to help you adopt this outlook? 

Learn to Accept and Adapt

When one bad thing enters their life, it starts to spread like an illness. It makes you use up all your energy by over focusing on the negativity. The negativity spreads from one task to the next. You are unable to get anything done since you are exhausted from negativity. Sound familiar? Now everything is just a mess! It’s time to learn to accept and adaptand this starts by recognizing the situation.

Just because you don’t get something done the first time doesn’t mean you won’t get it done at another point in the future. No one writes a book, paints a portrait or drives a car the first time they try.

Mindfulness

When you’re working on something and it causes you to think negatively about a task, mindfulness can center your thoughts. It gives you a calm feeling. It can help you overcome negativity. 

Using mindfulness techniques, you can maintain a clear focus on your goal. You will be able to make better choices to increase your productivity by simply unleashing your intuition. That means that you’ll focus on thoughts, ideas, and you will take positive action. Mindfulness prevents you from having to overthink situations. 

Improves Focus

Mindfulness improves focus. It lessens anxiety which can derail your productivity. It allows you to keep moving forward. Mindfulness enables you to find an inner satisfaction which lets you be fully engaged in the task. 

Improves Social Interactions

This will make a difference not only in what you get done but in how you get it done. Your interactions with others and with yourself will help you learn how to overcome negativity and change for the positive. Observe how you carry yourself in social interactions. 

Improves Creativity

You’ll gain a greater sense of commitment for the follow through. Mindfulness is a technique that can be used to improve your cognitive skills. This unleashes your thought processes to free your creativity. 

So, you learn to act rather than to react. With mindfulness comes a greater sense of confidence in your abilities and in your skills. Rather than think negatively you’ll learn to foster a can-do attitude toward whatever you’re doing. 

Work On Your Attitude

Having the right attitude helps you overcome negativity. Start by becoming more aware of your moods as you go about your day. Make an effort to be grateful and find the good side of things. Over time your positivity will increase, and it will help you stay on track and stay motivated. 

We all face setbacks. We all make mistakes. How we deal with them is what set’s successful people apart from the rest. Work on your positivity and find a lesson in everything that happens. You’ll come out on the other side stronger and better than before. 

Check your attitude and find the joy in everything you do. Keeping a journal can help, it makes you focus your thoughts. You can look back and see what of the things you worked and helped you make progress. Another powerful tip is to write. Create a journal or file of encouragement. Fill it with positive images and motivational quotes. Browse through the journal or file any time you need an extra boost of positivity.

9 Ways to Build A Positive Attitude 

1. Purpose

Highly positive people are able to comprehend and internalize the bigger picture. They see how their work fits into the whole, and therefore don’t start feeling like the smaller components of the journey are meaningless.

2. Optimism

Positive and motivated people envision a future. They gain energy to aim for a happy outcome. They are able to overcome setbacks from negativity. 

3. Self-Esteem

It’s hard to do anything when you don’t feel like you can do it. But positive and motivated people know their strengths, and they believe in themselves. They also acknowledge their weaknesses and grow from them. 

4. Energy

Positive people have the requisite energy—mental, physical, or emotional—to move forward to overcome negativity. 

5. Persistence

People with high levels of positivity are motivated. They don’t just give up when the going gets tough. They buckle down for the ride. 

6. Perspective

Highly positive and people don’t get it twisted with the small stuff. They know how to sort through life’s concerns and ignore the little things that could pull them off course.

7. Self-Reflection

Positive and motivated people reflect on the process and move forward with intelligence and strategy.

8. Humility

A humble person will have an easier time carrying out their plan, taking feedback, and adjusting course as necessary. Their attitude is more positive. They will not be offended—their eyes are on the prize, and they’ll take the help they need to get there.

9. Give Yourself Reasons to Celebrate

Positive and motivated people enjoy success and they celebrate it. They appreciate the hard work just done, and look forward to a new journey.

How To Overcome Negativity

If you are dealing with deep-rooted anger, then to overcome negativity consider healthy ways to deal with your anger. Sometimes it’s good and right to get mad. Positive change can come from being angry at injustice or inequality. Righteous or justified anger from being mistreated can be a great motivator for change. 

But if you’ve had bad experiences of anger, for instance, poor role models in your childhood, you might experience anger as a destructive bomb. Learning anger management so you can be in control of angry feelings can have a positive effect on your relationships. Here are some expert strategies to help you manage your anger.

1. Understand Yourself

Understanding why you’re angry and where it’s coming from is key. Maybe you’re stressed and grumpy, fatigued, or unwell. Perhaps the reason for your anger is apparent. 

Once you understand your anger and its sources, you can start to deal with it by eliminating the negative. 

2. Write It Down

Turning your feelings into words is a powerful act. Just write whatever comes into your head, even if it doesn’t make sense. 

The act of writing down your thoughts stops them from running in circles in your head and gets them down on paper. Chances are they might not even seem so big or insurmountable. You might even begin to see patterns, so you can understand what triggers your angry feelings. 

3. Take Action

Once you know what’s making you angry, you can plan workarounds for it. Be aware of your triggers and minimize them. For instance, get enough sleep, and exercise and take time out for self-care.

You won’t be able to avoid being angry sometimes, but you can take control, so you’re not vulnerable to anger and frustration. 

4. Don’t Brood

Brooding on the cause of your anger is actively unhelpful. It keeps you stuck in those negative feelings, keeps you stuck in victim mode, and keeps you powerless. 

Brooding is also bad for your blood pressure. You build up a constant stress response within your body. Adrenaline which is excellent in an emergency, spikes with brooding. 

5. Don’t Rehash Anger

Talking over your problems can be helpful if you share with a trusted friend. But be careful to keep it focused, or you might end up rehashing your troubles over and over again. Like brooding, complaining can keep you from moving forward and finding solutions to your problems. 

Find out how to overcome negative bias now!

Free E-Book when you subscribe to our newsletter:

Processing…
Success! You're on the list.

Categories
mindfulness Time management

7 productive ways to be more mindful

Living in the now helps you be more appreciative of what you have and look forward to the future. There are ways you can train yourself to be more mindful no matter whether you’re at home with your family, out for a walk or during work. Start becoming more mindful today by implementing these 7 productive ways to be more mindful.

1. Create what you desire

What do you genuinely want to experience in life? What journey do you want to be following? Being mindful starts with having a vision of what you want your life to be. Haven’t you noticed that there are so many distractions in life that can easily take you off track of your dreams, goals, or ambitions? To accomplish what you want, you have to stay focused during the good and the bad days. On the days you feel like giving up, be mindful of your desires and continue on.

Photo by Dominika Roseclay on Pexels.com

2. Be in alignment with your beliefs and values.

Knowing what matters most to you, deepest beliefs and values keeps you on your path. Live every day in alignment with them. When you do this, you are making the decision mentally to be mindful in your life and consciously aware of your life.

When you are mindful in life, you are aware of why you do something. You know and understand the reasons why you get up in the morning and go work. You have a purpose for living. 

Photo by Alex Azabache on Pexels.com

3. Disconnect from society and connect into your mind.

We live in a world that’s constantly “on”. It never switches off. Think about how Facebook, the internet, messaging, Instagram, emails, television, fast food, billboards, and advertising affect you. All these things are noise that is constantly inundating our minds and our lives.

Train yourself to be more mindful by disconnecting from society every once in a while. Instead connect to your own mind. Discover your emotions, thoughts, and feelings going on in your mind. Reflect upon what changes you need to make in your life if you are off course.

Photo by Vlad Alexandru Popa on Pexels.com

4. Ask yourself. What is your legacy?

What do you want to be remembered by? You can easily get stuck in routine and forget why you do what you do. Take the time to think about the end and why you do the things you do. Doing so keeps you mindful of your goals and values. 

Photo by Craig Adderley on Pexels.com

5. Create mindful actions.

Express yourself through your actions by becoming more aware of the moment. You can be more mindful in a negative way or a positive one. To be positive in your mindful actions, be in the moment, become aware of your body, your actions, and your thoughts. Observe the way you walk. How is your posture? What do you see, smell, hear? Apply this way of being in the now in everything you do. 

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

6. What inspires you?

What is your purpose in life? Do you have a reason that inspires you to get up and start your day in a positive way? Or are you living by routine? These routines are draining and take you away from living in the moment.

Get clear on your purpose in life so you can start living each day mindfully. You’ll know that everything you do is connected to fulfilling your chosen purpose.

Photo by Lum3n on Pexels.com

7. Know who you really are inside

Be real in everything you do. It’s impossible to live a more mindful life when you are and fake.

Always remain true to who you are. Stay connected to your inner being. Don’t conform to society’s expectations of who you are. When you know who you are, what you value and what you stand for, it’s easier to live in the now.

Photo by Claire Morgan on Pexels.com

Processing…
Success! You're on the list.
Categories
mindfulness

the meaning of mindful living

What does mindful living mean to me? Mindful living means to live in the moment. Through mindful living I am being conscious, and aware of my present using all my senses. It means that I’m not living in the past nor am I worrying about what the future will be.

When I concentrate on being in the present, I focus my attention on the task at hand. I give my undivided attention and let go of the outcome. Seizing the moment allows me to make each moment more meaningful and valuable.

Of course, this does not mean that I will forget about planning and setting goals. I should be able to do all these things and at the same time enjoy being in the present. For instance, through the act of setting a goal to exercise each day, I am living in the now. I enjoy planning the process, such as brainstorming ideas for exercise, taking advice from friends, or setting an appointment with a personal trainer.

Great Expectations

Everyday we place huge expectations on ourselves. We are always on the go and rushing from place to place. Sometimes we move from task to task and never enjoy the process. Haven’t you noticed that we tend to be completely oblivious to why we carry out in such a way?

We don’t stop and think about where we are. We miss the point of just being there. Instead, we should rely on the power of mindfulness.

When we live in the past, hanging onto hurtful experiences we are inflicting pain onto ourselves. Mindful living is about releasing that pain and finding pleasure in the simple things.

Living in the now means that you need to trust in the future. You are positive and optimistic in the present. By this simple act of being, you open to the possibility of a promising future.

What does mindful living mean to me?

Mindful living in the now allows me to begin to notice the beauty and wonder of the moment and the surrounding things. I learn how to focus and manage my energy on what is most important. This is just one of the benefits of living in the now.

Living in the moment is beneficial in many ways. From physical health to your mental status, being mindful enhances life. Here are several ways living in the moment benefits us:

Better Physical Health

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

By reducing stress and anxiety we are able to avoid the health consequences associated with them. This includes high blood pressure, heart disease and obesity.

Better Psychological Health:

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

Being mindful improves our psychological well-being because we are more in tune with what is happening around and within you.

Improved Relationships

Most of us have been with someone who is with us physically, but their mind is a million miles away. This makes the relationship extremely difficult. But when we are with someone who is fully present, the experience is enjoyable and it creates a deeper connection. By living in the now, we can be the person others enjoy being with and make your relationships easier.

Better self-control

When we are living in the moment, we are in better control over our mind, your body and your emotions. We no longer have a racing mind and unpredictable emotions controlling our life. 

Better focus

Living a mindful life allows us to stay focused on what’s happening in the present. We are not worrying about what happened in the past or stressing about what might happen in the future. We are able to focus fully on the now.

Healthier choices

Being mindful helps us make healthier food choices because we are paying attention to what we choose to eat and how much you eat. Food tastes better because we are paying attention to all the sensations of each bite. We savor each bite by putting your fork down between bites. 

Better decisions

Living in the now helps us make better decisions. We are more aware of your circumstances and opportunities.

Feeling less overwhelmed

Living in the now helps us see what needs to be done now instead of being overwhelmed by the scope of a large project.

Feeling less stress 

We are more in tune with the world around us instead of being lost in your own thoughts all the time. We are able to identify what bothers us and not stress over it. 

Living in the moment has an abundant number of benefits that can help us improve our life. It helps us stay healthier, have less stress and be more aware of each moment of the day. The way that we conduct ourselves in our personal and professional life begins with how we use your mind. We can teach our mind to accept ourselves and gain empowerment – or we can stay stuck in self-defeating behaviors. 

How to Accept Yourself

Once you learn to accept yourself, you will be able to have compassion for yourself, too. This will defeat any negative internal talk that you may have been practicing. Meditation is a strategy that you can use to achieve mindfulness in order to accept and empower yourself. 

It helps those who practice meditation quiet the mind. A peaceful mind allows you to be fully in the present and accept emotions and thoughts.

For a peaceful meditation, choose a place where you will be comfortable to be more relaxed.

Some people choose to sit while meditating and others prefer to lie down. You can also practice mindful meditation while you are walking outside or in your home. Relax and focus on what is around you and how you are inhaling and exhaling. 

Be aware of the sensations you feel and the emotions that you are experiencing. Another strategy that is often used is deep breathing. You can start this the same way that you would with mindful meditation where you find a comfortable place and begin. 

But you can also practice deep breathing while you are active at home or at work. You focus on drawing in deep breaths and slowly release them.

Another strategy is mindful thought replacement. This method is a mindfulness cognitive behavioral technique. Rather than simply letting the thought pass through your mind, these are strategies that call for you to be aware of your thoughts. Whenever any negative self talk pops into your mind, you make a conscious choice to stop and correct the thought. 

You correct it by replacing it with accepting words that help you accept yourself as you are. This helps you reprogram your thoughts to enable you to feel empowered rather than listening to words that hinder you and create self-doubt. 

Why Living in the Moment is Difficult

Even though there are many benefits of living in the moment, it can often be difficult to do. All our lives we’ve been encouraged to think about the future and remember the past. Advertising, notifications, messages, reminders, alerts are all geared to what’s coming up or what happened previously. We tend to get caught up in what’s going on around us that we don’t pay attention to what’s happening in the moment.

Why is this a problem? 

The problem comes from the stress, strain, wear, and tear of living on a day-to-day basis causing us emotional and physical problems.

Here are other factors that contribute to living in the now:

When you’re in the flow in what you’re doing and you end up getting pulled away from it by a notification on your phone. This pulls you away from the present and being aware. This is one reason living in the moment is difficult.

The basic nature of our mind is to dwell on our pas and worry about our future. We face a lot of uncertainty that causes anxiety when we live in the moment. When you are fully into the moment you aren’t thinking about what will happen in the next, which can cause worry about the future.

We have a hard time keeping focused on the moment. Our minds naturally wander. We have an innate ability to always be thinking, wandering, asking, pondering, and just having random thoughts.

We don’t worry about the present moment because it’s already decided. That means our mind naturally goes to the past or to predicting the future. We use our past as the basis for what the future will be. This tendency can get out of control, and we begin to see dangers that are not actually there.

There is comfort in the possibility of what’s to come, something that lies beyond today – hope. We have hope that tomorrow will be better than this moment, this now. So, we are constantly thinking of what is next.

These thoughts, assumptions and fears keep us from living in the present moment. It can be hard fighting these issues, but we are can change the tendencies of our brains. Practicing mindfulness helps us get stronger at it and makes it possible to overcome the harmful or destructive choices and make better ones

Free Meditation Book when you Subscribe to Newsletter:

Processing…
Success! You're on the list.