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Motivation

a beginner’s guide to strengthening belief in yourself when you are feeling crappy

Look for inspiration

Think back to a time when someone inspired you. It could be a conference you attended or saw online. You could have read a profile of someone you admired. Whatever the case, the motivation of others can strengthen how you see yourself.

You have likely read books about famous people who you admired. These often show you what they had to go through to become successful. They write about the pain they had to endure and all the challenges they faced to achieve their goals. Sometimes, the stories will shock you. It’s hard to believe that these famous people ever had to deal with adverse situations.

The internet gives us plenty of opportunities to view stories of high-profile people. Just search on YouTube, and you will find hundreds (if not thousands) of videos of these people describing their experiences. You may find books covering the same subject, but videos may have more impact on you. However, there’s usually much more detail in books rather than in a video. Therefore, you should take advantage of both. Sometimes, you will be lucky enough to meet the people who you admire. You can often meet people at conferences or meet-ups. It’s great to talk to these people and ask them questions. Most people in this position will gladly accept these questions. Of course, you want to be respectful of their time and not hog the question and answer session.

It’s great to have others who help motivate you. However, if you place them too high on a pedestal, you may find it difficult to motivate yourself. You will start to believe these people have an innate ability that you don’t possess. That is counterproductive since it places you at risk for an imposter syndrome. You need to realize they all started the same as you. Some may have had initial advantages, but even people with these advantages don;t always do right with them. Most people still need to work hard to attain their goals.

Another issue is spending too much time listening or reading about people who motivate you. At some point, you must take appropriate action to get going with your own goals. It is worthwhile to feed off the motivation of others, but you need to do more than reading books. None of that matters unless you put in the effort yourself. Once that happens, others may be coming to you one day saying how you helped motivate them.

If you believe in yourself, there is little to stop you in whatever you want to accomplish. It gives you the power to push forward and to defy the odds. You will be able to handle any roadblocks that come your way. You will also brush off the naysayers. It gives you peace of mind when you stick to your self-belief.

To keep that self-belief strong, you need to define your goals. You wouldn’t expect a general to fight a war without a map. You too need a map to guide you on how to proceed. Too many people skip this step and wonder why they aren’t getting anywhere. Goals are your guidance, but carrying through with them is only done when you believe that it’s possible. 

The belief is the energy you need to take action. It helps you to focus on getting your tasks complete. You will also build confidence when you have self-belief. It’s a powerful tool as others will be attracted to that confidence. They will follow your lead, and you will help show them what is possible. 

When you run into any stumbling blocks (and you will), that confidence will help you see them through. You will know how to take alternative action when necessary. The people following you will respect that as well. Several forces will try to beat you down. You may even find yourself letting it happen. You need to get centered on why you started your journey in the first place.

Use affirmations to reinforce your message. Be consistent with your affirmations.

Unfortunately, many of the negative forces are going to be from your family and friends. They will see it as helping you avoid mistakes. Many people will succumb to this negative pressure and give up. One way to prevent this is to join groups of like-minded individuals. It can be related to your business, or it can be groups that focus on self-help. These organizations exist to try and push the negative forces out. It’s great to go to meetings and get encouragement from the group. Attending these groups can sometimes lead to friendships with people where you can extend the encouragement of each other. You may even form business partnerships from these friendships. It’s good to know that you have the support of these people when these relationships form. They understand when everyone else around you doesn’t. Your self-belief will strengthen considerably from this arrangement.

Below are a few ways you can learn to strengthen you belief further with yourself:

Develop Positive Affirmations

Grab a stack of sticky notes and write down all the things you love about yourself. Then place these sticky notes in places where you will find them later. These places could be on your mirror, in your wallet, or even around your desk at work. Then every time you see them, you can be reminded of what an amazing person you are.

Quit Scrolling Social Media

Social media creates unrealistic expectations of the human body. If you feel uncomfortable in your skin because of social media, it’s time to stop participating. Instead, it would be best to find more body-positive media to engage in, such as books, music, and TV shows that make you feel great about who you are.

Even if you see yourself as a totally peaceful person, you may find yourself participating in social rivalry. And if you’re naturally competitive, you likely enjoy challenging your friends. However, by avoiding certain kinds of contests, you can create more joy in your life.

Sometimes competition is good. Playing poker or indulging in a friendly online challenge with your loved ones can be fun and relaxing. But when you start comparing yourself to others, you may find that there’s no winner, and everyone feels hurt afterward.

By avoiding social contests, you can begin to enjoy your life just as it is. In the end, you can choose to create whatever experiences you desire. Today, decide that your life will be filled with satisfaction. 

Spend a few minutes today thinking about the richness your friends bring to your life and how much you share with them. When you’re tempted to compete, focus on what you have in common. Before you know it, positive thoughts will be second nature to you, and you’ll begin to love your life!

Today, choose to refrain from social comparisons and set yourself free from the ties of negativity. Next time you’re prompted to join in competition, just decline. Choose kindness and support instead. Nurture your relationships and they will stand the test of time.

Remember that you can always create more fulfilling friendships, no matter how long you may have been competing with each other.

Work On Your Body Language

Believe it or not, your body language can play a huge part in feeling comfortable in your own skin. Every time you find yourself hunched over with your arms folded, how does this make you feel? Not very good, right? Exactly. It’s time to walk with your shoulders pulled back, and your head held high—you’ll be surprised by how much this small change affects your mood.

Here is a free download for affirmations:

By Addy

Inspirational blogger, previous Yahoo Voices writer. Meditation practitioner.

3 replies on “a beginner’s guide to strengthening belief in yourself when you are feeling crappy”

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